December arrived, and as is usual, it was accompanied by the gentle pop that heralds the opening of the first door on the Lego advent calendar. Of course down under Christmas is not all Tinsel and Mince Pies…With December comes Mosquitoes, Flies, Snakes, Sunburn, and Nights so hot its not difficult to imagine, that the Sun has got stuck mid way through it’s journey across the sky. This is probably why it’s quite difficult to reconcile enormous glittering Snowflakes hanging from the lamp posts in the town centre, and Bing Crosby crooning about Snow….
Ten years into a Southern Hemisphere Existence and the traditionally Winter Festival of Christmas still doesn’t feel quite right…Don’t get me wrong, I am as passionate about celebrating now, as I ever have been, but its hard to tuck into Sausage meat and Turkey when it’s hot enough outside to roast the Turkey without an oven.
Christmas has always been a time for me to enjoy downtime and family, and indulge in my twin passions of giving gifts, and drinking Port. This year I have the added bonus of a few weeks much needed rest. Only now after two weeks at home, am I beginning to understand quite how burned out I really am.
When I was flying, we used a phrase called “Maxed Out” This was the moment, when the workload in the cockpit became so intense, it was simply impossible absorb any other tasks, and processing the steady stream of information coming in from multiple sources became a challenge. A dangerous situation in the air, and an uncomfortable one on the ground. It seems like I have been operating “Maxed Out” for a little while. Living with a combination of PTSD, a plethora of hormone imbalances, and a struggle to understand how I slot into the world as Suzanne is hard work. Believing that I am doing the right thing, whilst simultaneously experiencing the knowledge that I surely haven’t, has taken it’s toll.
The Festive period is an ideal time to kick back and offload a ton of baggage that I’ve been lugging around for too many years. It’s going to take a week or two to clean out the trash can of my consciousness, but I’ve started the process, and I think it feels better already..
Regular readers will know I like to publish a Philosophical quote every now and then, and today seems like an ideal opportunity to share this wisdom from an underrated Sage from Walsall, in the UK.
“So here it is Merry Christmas, everybody’s having fun, look to the future now, it’s only just begun…….” – Noddy Holder 🙂